The advanced dialogue class begins later today! And I promise you
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Justifications: Their "legitimate reasons" and excuses for what they do.
--------------------------------------------- CONTRASTING DIALOGUE. The simplest form of the technique is this: Dialogue gives one message, Action/environment gives another. The strategy is simple: A. Put two things together that contrast each other. B. Simply oppose dialogue and actions in some way. --------------------------------------------- DIALOGUE STRUCTURES 1. Circular dialogue. One or more characters begin a subject, are interrupted, and then circle back to their original subject. 2. Metaphoric dialogue. There are two varieties of metaphoric dialogue: A. When someone speaks through metaphors. B. When two characters are doing and talking about something that actually represents something more important to them. 3. Two different conversations at the same time. Person A talks about one thing. Person B talks about another. You'd think they're in two different rooms. --------------------------------------------- ANTICIPATORY DIALOGUE FORMATS 1. Direct prediction. 2. Indirect prediction. 3. Countdown. 4. Imply consequences. 5. Imply hopelessness. 6. Shield from consequences in advance. 7. Warnings. 8. Create reputation for the villain. 9. Confront someone hiding from a future consequence. 10. A challenge issued. 11. Silence at a strange time. --------------------------------------------- DIALOGUE SUBTEXT -- COVER UPS Dialogue Subtext comes in two types: 1. The cover up 2. Subtext pointers METHODS OF COVER-UP: - Silence: Person doesn't answer when they should. - Action incongruent with words. - Change subject. - Question them. - Attack back. - Complement them. - Threaten them - Confirm something they already believe whether it's true or not. - Misdirection: Do or say something that sends their mind in a different direction. - Inappropriate reaction to an emotional event. - Distraction. - Make a joke of it. - Continue the conversation as if nothing happened. --------------------------------------------- DIALOGUE SUBTEXT -- SUBTEXT POINTERS Metaphor - The application of a word or phrase to an object or concept which it does not literally denote. Essentially "A is B." Implication - Something indicated or suggested as naturally to be inferred. You are implying a conclusion. Insinuation - An indirect or covert suggestion or hint. This usually comes as an indirect accusation. Hint - A clue, a slight covert suggestion. You are clueing the reader or character in to a small part without giving them the entire puzzle. Sarcasm
- A sneering or cutting remark toward an object of ridicule. Allusion - To reference casually or indirectly. ††††††††††ଋ ††††††††††ଠଋ ††††††††††ଋଭ --------------------------------------------- FORMATS FOR COLORFUL DIALOGUE - Take to extreme - Poetic - Unique Naming - Jargon - Write emotionally - Contradictory statements - Strange conclusions --------------------------------------------- Copyright 2003, Hal Croasmun, all rights reserved. HYPERLINK "http://www.ScriptForSale.com" \t "_blank" http://www.ScriptForSale.com Assignments
We HEAR EASY-LISTENING MUSIC. Lester, Carolyn and Jane are eating dinner by CANDLELIGHT. RED ROSES are bunched in a vase at the center of the table. Nobody makes eye contact, or even seems aware of anybody else's presence, until... Mom, do we always have to listen to this elevator music? CAROLYN
(considers) No. No, we don't. As soon as you've prepared a nutritious yet savory meal that I'm about to eat, you can listen to whatever you like. Subtext: I'm the one who provides for the family. If you can achieve half of this, I'll let you do what you want. A long beat. Lester suddenly turns to Jane. LESTER
So Janie, how was school? (suspicious) It was okay. LESTER
Just okay? No, Dad. It was spec-tac-ular. Subtext: Since you dislike my answer, I'll give you a better one. Satisfied? A beat. LESTER
Well, you want to know how things went at my job today? Now she looks at him as if he's lost his mind. LESTER (cont'd) They've hired this efficiency expert, this really friendly guy named Brad, how perfect is that? And he's basically there to make it seem like they're justified in firing somebody, because they couldn't just come right out and say that, could they? No, no, that would be too... honest. And so they've asked us-- (off her look) --you couldn't possibly care any less, could you? Subtext: Why are you looking at me like this? Carolyn is watching this closely. (uncomfortable) Well, what do you expect? You can't all of a sudden be my best friend, just because you had a bad day. Subtext: What are you taking me for? She gets up and heads toward the kitchen. JANE (cont'd) I mean, hello. You've barely even spoken to me for months. She's gone. Lester notices Carolyn looking at him critically. LESTER Oh, what, you're mother-of-the- year? You treat her like an employee. Subtext: Why can't you love her like a mother instead of expecting something from her? CAROLYN
(taken aback) What?!
Subtext: Say that again. Lester is quiet, staring at his plate. CAROLYN (cont'd) (more authority) Subtext: Say that again, if you dare. Lester gets up and starts after Jane, taking his plate with him. LESTER I'm going to get some ice cream. Subtext: I'd better leave before anything happens. Carolyn watches him go, irritated. INT. BURNHAM HOUSE - CONTINUOUS Jane stands at the sink, rinsing off her plate. Lester enters. LESTER Honey, I'm sorry. I... Jane turns and stares at him, waiting for him to finish. LESTER (cont'd) I'm sorry I haven't been more available, I just... I'm... Subtext: I didn't mean to be cold to you all this while. I'm sorry. He's looking to her for a little help here, but she's too uncomfortable with this sudden intimacy to give him any. LESTER (cont'd) (finally) You know, you don't always have to wait for me to come to you... Subtext: I'm always here for you if you need me. Oh, great. So now it's my fault? LESTER
I didn't say that. It's nobody's fault. Janie, what happened? You and I used to be pals. Subtext: Why are you treating me this way? Dialogue Scene from The Family Man
face, now HUMMING the Bach piece from memory... The doors open at 6. Jack self-consciously stops singing as ELIZABETH PETERSON, 60s, wearing a mink coat, gets on the elevator carrying a yappy little dog. JACK (a charming smile) Mrs. Peterson.
Hello Jack. You don't have to stop singing on my account...
It's because I'm shy, Betty. So, when are you going to leave that old corpse Mr. Peterson and run away with me?
You know you could never satisfy me the way he does...
The doors open to the lobby. Mrs. Peterson walks out ahead. INT. JACK'S BUILDING, LOBBY - MORNING TONY THE DOORMAN holds the door open for Jack and Mrs. Peterson... TONY THE DOORMAN Merry Christmas, Mr. Campbell. JACK How'd you do this year, Tony? TONY THE DOORMAN About four grand. And a bottle of twenty five year old scotch from Mrs. Johnson in 9D. I'm putting it all in commercial paper like you said.
Just until the Deutsche Mark turns...
JACK
...if MedTech's shares sink any lower than...
(casually executing a keystroke) ...forty three, we're in trouble with the stock valuation. So for god's sake watch what you say to your institutional customers... (COMMENTS: In the conference room, we see a different Jack - a smart, driven investment banker... Jack notices Alan Mintz playing with the cherub. JACK (CONT'D) ...we still have almost a full day of trading before zero hour and I don't want any trouble... (distracted by Mintz) ...penny for your thoughts, Alan... (...who is a demanding boss) Alan looks up. ALAN Sorry, Jack. I told Dee and the kids I'd be home by dinner. You know, it being Christmas Eve and all. JACK Is that tonight? (Jack's response indicates his work takes priority over Christmas and he expects his staff to feel the same. This is a major set-up for the transformation of his character arc). A LAUGH from the group. Jack approaches Alan. JACK (CONT'D) You think I like being here on Christmas Eve, Alan?
I don't know. Maybe... Another LAUGH. Even Jack lets out a good-natured chuckle. (Jack's teasing words diffuse the tension. The laughter from the group shows camaraderie rather than animosity. Here is a boss who is respected even if he is inconsiderate.) JACK Okay, maybe I do have a touch of tunnel vision this holiday season. But in two days we're going to announce one of the largest mergers in U.S. corporate history. Thirty billion dollars... (basking in the glory) When this kind of deal turns up you get on and you ride it 'till it's over. You don't ask it for a vacation... (And he is not asking them to work for no good reason. Here we learn the stakes...) A chuckle from the group...the esprit de corps seems to energize Jack.
(to the group) December 26th. After that there'll be so much money floating around here it'll be like Christmas every day...
(smiling) December 26th, people. If you'd like to celebrate that day, you all have my blessing... (...the promise...) Enthusiastic nods and words of agreement from the suits around the table... ALAN You're right, Jack. Sorry... Jack approaches Alan. JACK I don't want you to be sorry, Alan, I want you to be excited. I want my gift to be the first one you open this year. You know why?
Why Jack? JACK Because my gift comes with ten zeroes at the end...
Good man... (Alan's tempered resentment draws out the rationale from Jack. At the beginning, Jack comes across as a task-master but by the end, we understand where he's coming from and even condones it somewhat because of the reward promised. His final remark shows his appreciation.) Chasing Amy, Kevin Smith INT STUDIO - NIGHT Holden enters. Banky’s still playing Sega. Holden sits next to him. HOLDEN
(off screen) How bad do you suck! BANKY How was your pseudo-date? HOLDEN Leave it alone. Builds tension, looming conflict BANKY
That chick bugs me. HOLDEN
(rubs his head; in baby-talk) Aww. Everyone bugs you. BANKY Get off.
(off game) Fucking faggot! Did you see that?! Your dyke courting ass just got me scored on! HOLDEN (beat)
You know, you should watch that. If you’re going to get all bent out of shape while playing the game, so much so that you need to curse the t.v., try not to gay-bash it, alright. You’re nor that kind of guy. (gets up) And don’t call her a dyke, alright? She’s a lesbian. Says were friends, but I your small minded, you haven't seen the big picture. Holden goes to his drawing table and takes off his coat. Banky sits there, shocked. He puts the controller down and crosses to the drawing table. BANKY
What the fuck is going on here? HOLDEN
(pulling out pencil) I’m starting a new page. BANKY (smacking pencil away) Not with this shit! With you. What the fuck is going on with you and that girl? Intro to conflict, were we see point and counter point of each character HOLDEN We’re friends. BANKY She’s programming you. HOLDEN I beg your pardon? Programming? BANKY Yeah.
And apparently, you don’t even realize it. What does it matter if I refer to her as a dyke, or if I call the Whalers a bunch of faggots in the privacy of my own office, far from the sensitive ears of the rest of the world? HOLDEN
It’s passive/aggressive gay-bashing; and I know you’re not really prejudiced at heart. You should just find some other way to express your anger, is all I’m saying. Holden starts drawing. Banky stares at him. Then he grabs the pencil out of Holden’s hand and shoves him to the side. He starts drawing something. Banky makes the statement of the MOVIE, People don't change!
What the fuck are you doing! BANKY Bear with me here. I just want to put you through this little exercise. (drawing feverishly) Okay, now see this? This is a four way road, okay? Banky draws a four-way stop. He illustrates according to his voice-over. BANKY V.O. And dead in the center, is a crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now at the end of each of the streets, are four people, okay? You following? Up here, we got a male-affectionate, easy- to-get-along-with, no political agenda lesbian. Okay? Now down here, we have a man-hating, angry-as-fuck, agenda-of-rage, bitter dyke. To this side, we got Santa Claus, right? And over to this side - the Easter Bunny. Banky finishes drawing. Holden’s shaking his head BANKY
Which one’s going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? HOLDEN What is this supposed to prove? BANKY I’m serious. This is a serious exercise. It’s like an S.A.T. question. Which one’s going to get to the hundred dollar bill first - the male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny?
HOLDEN (beat; then pissed) The man-hating dyke. BANKY
Good. Why?
HOLDEN I don
t know. BANKY
(wildly crossing out the other three) BECAUSE THESE OTHER THREE ARE FIGMENTS OF YOUR FUCKING IMAGINATION! Holden storms away. Banky follows.
That is checkmate! Here's a scene I like from the classic film, SUNSET BOULEVARD
Setup: Gillis a B-movie script writer who dreams of Hollywood success desperately needs quick money to keep his new convertible away from the repo men. A-11
SHELDRAKE'S OFFICE It is in the style of a Paramount executive's office -- mahogany, leather, and a little chintz. On the walls are some large framed photographs of Paramount stars, with dedications to Mr. Sheldrake. Also a couple of framed critics' awards certificates, and an Oscar on a bookshelf. A shooting schedule chart is thumb-tacked into a large bulletin board. There are piles or scripts, a few pipes and, somewhere in the background, some set models. Start on Sheldrake. He is about 45. Behind his wor- ried face there hides a coated tongue. He is en- gaged in changing the stained filter cigarette in his Zeus holder. Good character intro. SHELDRAKE All right, Gillis. You've got five minutes. What's your story about? GILLIS
It's about a ball player, a rookie shortstop that's batting 347. The poor kid was once mixed up in a hold- up. But he's trying to go straight -- except there's a bunch of gamblers who won't let him. SHELDRAKE So they tell the kid to throw the World Series, or else, huh? GILLIS
More or less. Only for the end I've got a gimmick that's real good.
This shows Gillis as someone who knows the ropes and can pitch an exec. Sheldrake by anticipating the story shows he's been around the block too. All pretty much the expected. A secretary enters, carrying a glass or milk. She opens a drawer and takes out a bottle of pills for Sheldrake.
Sheldrake is under pressure. SHELDRAKE Got a title? GILLIS Bases Loaded. There's a 4O-page outline. SHELDRAKE (To the secretary) Get the Readers' Department and see what they have on Bases Loaded.
Sheldrake isn't fooling around. He's calling Gillis bluff. Bringing in a third party. The secretary exits. Sheldrake takes a pill and washes it down with some milk. GILLIS They're pretty hot about it over at Twentieth, but I think Zanuck's all wet. Can you see Ty Power as a GILLIS (cont'd) shortstop? You've got the best man for it right here on this lot. Alan Ladd. Good change of pace for Alan Ladd. There's another thing: it's pretty simple to shoot. Lot of outdoor stuff. Bet you could make the whole thing for under a million. And there's a great little part for Bill Demarest. One of the trainers, an oldtime player who got beaned and goes out of his head sometimes.
Gillis tries a bluff, maybe in desperation to what the story department reader might say. The details of his story are worked out otherwise the dialogue would seem phony. Not the actors: Ty Power, Alan Ladd, even William Demarest who Gillis calls Bill. The door opens and Betty Schaefer enters -- a clean- cut, nice looking girl of 21, with a bright, alert manner. Dressed in tweed skirt, Brooks sweater and pearls, and carrying a folder of papers. She puts them on Sheldrake's desk, not noticing Gillis, who stands near the door. Note noticing Gillis. This is good misdirection as we'll see. BETTY
Hello, Mr. Sheldrake. On that Bases Loaded. I covered it with a 2-page synopsis. (She holds it out) But I wouldn't bother. Here's the twist. A good looking young female as the reader and she says, not knowing the writer is in the room, But I wouldn't bother. Priceless! SHELDRAKE What's wrong with it? BETTY It's from hunger. Again, priceless. She doesn't mince words. SHELDRAKE Nothing for Ladd? BETTY
Just a rehash of something that wasn't very good to begin with. SHELDRAKE I'm sure you'll be glad to meet Mr. Gillis. He wrote it. Betty turns towards Gillis, embarrassed.
Sheldrake has set her up. That and not seeing Gillis. But Sheldrake knows his office layout. SHELDRAKE This is Miss Kramer. BETTY Schaefer. Betty Schaefer. And right now I wish I could crawl into a hole and pull it in after me. He got her name wrong. A good touch. A reversal. Seeing Gillis, she wishes she hadn't been so blunt. GILLIS If I could be of any help... BETTY I'm sorry, Mr. Gillis, but I just don't think it's any good. I found it flat and banal. GILLIS Exactly what kind of material do you recommend? James Joyce? Dostoosvsky? Note the back and forth. Idealist versus practicality. Joyce and the mispronounced Russian writer. (In the film I think he pronounces it correctly.) SHELDRAKE Name dropper. Sheldrake is trying to diffuse any arguments. BETTY I just think pictures should say a little something. GILLIS
Oh, you're one of the message kids.
Just a story won't do. You'd have turned down Gone With the Wind. SHELDRAKE No, that was me. I said, Who |