Ana səhifə

The advanced dialogue class begins later today! And I promise you


Yüklə 0.72 Mb.
səhifə3/13
tarix25.06.2016
ölçüsü0.72 Mb.
1   2   3   4   5   6   7   8   9   ...   13

who can forget Frank Robinson or

Milt Pappas, for Godsakes!

(beat)

It's a long season and you got to



trust it.

ANNIE STARTS FOR THE DOOR and grabs her baseball

glove.

NOTE: In this last portion of dialogue, we have the Mentor and the



Cosmic trait expressed through a baseball metaphor. Can you see

why the writer/director choose this voice-over to begin this movie?

By page three, we are willing to follow this character anywhere as

she takes us through this story.

Once you start thinking about your characters this way, you'll see

this is an easy thing to do. You can start at any point you already

know. Maybe you have a character who has justified dropping out of

college by saying that he didn't have time to do it and business at

the same time. Just by knowing one piece of the puzzle, you can

fill out the others.

Here's what five minutes work did for this one justification:

World View: Money is all that matters.

Metaphor: The next Bill Gates

Rules and Strategies: Beat them before they beat you. Seize

every opportunity. Innovate or die.

Justifications: "Just made sense to quit college." "Okay to

take parents money because they want him to succeed." "Don't have

to listen to others because they don't know shit."

Now, it is your turn.

ASSIGNMENT

---------------------

Write a scene where a character displays their World View.

1. List the World View, a Life Metaphor, one or more Rules

and Strategies and one or more Justifications like I did

above.

2. Write a scene where that character OVERTLY displays



their World View and each of its components.

3. Answer the question "What I learned doing this assignment

is...?"

Deadline: 48 hours.



----------------------------

You can use a monologue like above or have one character introduce

their world to another. Or you can create a more complex scene.

Whatever you do is fine. Just present one character with a full

World View.

Don't worry about whether the scene fits your movie right now or

not, just do it to get a new view of your character and how they

speak. What this will do is provide a new level of depth to your

characters and their dialogue.

One last thing: If you have any worries about whether you can do

this, just take the first steps. Because you'll find that this is

easier than it looks. Pick a character and find one of those four

things that stands out -- either a justification, rule, strategy,

life metaphor or World View. Whichever comes up first, work with it

to develop the others. Once you start, you'll see. It will flow

for you.


An important reminder:

Give yourself permission to turn in poor work.

I can't emphasize how important this is. That is why I covered it in the Pre-training email. Remember, we're doing "first-draft" work here. So don't think you have to turn in brilliant stuff.

I want you to have the freedom to learn without worrying about criticism.

This is especially important now that we're writing scenes using the

skills. It is 10 times better to write a poor scene with poor dialogue

using these techniques than it is to stress yourself out thinking you need to be the best and not complete the assignment.

Know what I mean?

I've seen too many people slow to a crawl because they're trying to turn A+ work, when the ones who have freed their own internal criticism are writing, learning and growing every day as they complete all of their assignments on time.

Just remind yourself that we're in a learning process where you benefit

most by completing the assignments and giving it your best try. And

WHATEVER YOU DO IS FINE.

Day 4: Contrasting Dialogue
Yesterday was complex and threw some people for a loop, so today, I'd like us to work with a technique that is easy, has a variety of applications, and can elevate dialogue in many scenes.

It is called CONTRASTING DIALOGUE.

The simplest form of the technique is this:

Dialogue gives one message, Action/environment gives another.

Often, this is used for comedy, but it can also illuminate character, as well as provide some profound messages. Here's a famous scene from the movie NETWORK where contrast is what made it famous.

This is 2/3rds the way through the movie. Diane is an early 30's

up-and-coming news producer who is having an affair with Max, who is just retiring from the business and is in his 60's. He's obsessed with her and she's obsessed with...well, you'll see.

From NETWORK

EXT. MOTOR COURT - NIGHT

DIANA and MAX getting out of their car and heading for one

of the ground-level rooms, MAX unlocking the door --

(chirping merrily

along)

-- Walter thinks we can knock out



the misprision of felony charge --

They go into

INT. MOTOR COURT - THEIR ROOM

MAX flicks the light on, kicks the door shut, and they are

instantly into each other's arms in a passionate embrace.

-- but he says absolutely nix

on going to series. They'll hit us

with inducement and conspiracy

to commit a crime --

She busily removes her shoes and unbuttons her blouse and

whisks out of her slacks; and, down to her bikini panties,

she is now scouring the walls for a thermostat.

Christ, it's cold in here --

(she turns up the

You see we're paying these nuts from

the Ecumenical Liberation Army ten

thousand bucks a week to bring in

authentic film footage on their

revolutionary activities, and that

constitutes inducement to commit a

crime; and Walter says we'll all

wind up in federal prison --

Nubile and nearly naked, she entwines herself around MAX,

who, by now, has stripped down to his trousers; and the two

hungering bodies slide down onto the bed where they commence

an affable moment of amative foreplay --

(efficiently unbuckling

and unzippering MAX's

trousers)

-- I said: "Walter, let the government

sue us! We'll take them to the

Supreme Court! We'll be front page

for months! The Washington Post and

the New York Times will be doing two

editorials a week about us! We'll

have more press than Watergate!"

Groping, grasping, gasping and fondling, they contrive to

denude each other, and, in a fever of sexual hunger, DIANA

mounts MAX, and the SCREEN is filled with the voluptuous

writhings of love, DIANA crying out with increasing

exultancy --

(in the throes of

passion)

-- All I need -- is six weeks

of federal litigation -- and the Mao

Tse Tung Hour -- can start carrying

its own time slot!

She screams in consummation, sighs a long, deliciously

shuddering sigh, and sinks softly down into MAX's embrace.

For a moment, she rests her head on MAX's chest, eyes closed

in feline contentment.

(after a moment, she

purrs)

What's really bugging me now is my



daytime programming. NBC's got a

lock on daytime with their lousy

game shows, and I'd like to bust

them. I'm thinking of doing a

homosexual soap opera -- The Dykes

the heart-rending saga of a

woman helplessly in love with her

husband's mistress. What do you

think?

What do you think? They could have done a business lunch where all they



talked about was business and then done a love scene where all they talked about is love/sex and it would have bored us to tears. But contrast the two and we've got an extremely compelling scene that tells us so much about the characters and their relationship.

So many times, people think dialogue has to "say" something to be

powerful. Many times, the power comes from a message that is delivered

that is completely different than the dialogue. Let me ask you a question.

When does talking about Big Macs make a scene interesting?

Read this scene from PULP FICTION and you'll see how this "irrelevant"

conversation sets a tone for who these two characters are and how routine killing is for them.

INT. '74 CHEVY (MOVING) - MORNING

An old gas guzzling, dirty, white 1974 Chevy Nova BARRELS

down a homeless-ridden street in Hollywood. In the front

seat are two young fellas -- one white, one black -- both

wearing cheap black suits with thin black ties under long

green dusters. Their names are VINCENT VEGA (white) and

JULES WINNFIELD (black). Jules is behind the wheel.

NOTE: I cut out some of their conversation about Vincent going to Europe just to get to the exciting Big Mac part quicker.

VINCENT


But you know what the funniest thing

about Europe is?

VINCENT

It's the little differences. A



lotta the same shit we got here,

they got there, but there they're a

little different.

Examples?

VINCENT

Well, in Amsterdam, you can buy



beer in a movie theatre. And I

don't mean in a paper cup either.

They give you a glass of beer, like

in a bar. In Paris, you can buy

beer at MacDonald's. Also, you

know what they call a Quarter

Pounder with Cheese in Paris?

They don't call it a Quarter

Pounder with Cheese?

VINCENT


No, they got the metric system

there, they wouldn't know what the

fuck a Quarter Pounder is.

What'd they call it?

VINCENT

Royale with Cheese.



(repeating)

Royale with Cheese. What'd they

call a Big Mac?

VINCENT


Big Mac's a Big Mac, but they call

it Le Big Mac.

What do they call a Whopper?

VINCENT


I dunno, I didn't go into a Burger

King. But you know what they put

on french fries in Holland instead

of ketchup?

VINCENT

Mayonnaise.



Goddamn!

VINCENT


I seen 'em do it. And I don't mean

a little bit on the side of the

plate, they fuckin' drown 'em in

Uuccch!


NOTE: If that was all this scene was about, we'd be so disappointed with it, but now, the contrast shows up in the next scene and a whole new understanding of these characters and their part in this story

emerges. BTW, did you notice how engaged they were in their Big Mac

conversation?

INT. CHEVY (TRUNK) - MORNING

The trunk of the Chevy OPENS UP, Jules and Vincent reach

inside, taking out two .45 Automatics, loading and cocking

We should have shotguns for this

kind of deal.

VINCENT

How many up there?



Three or four.

VINCENT


Counting our guy?

I'm not sure.

VINCENT

So there could be five guys up



there?

It's possible.

VINCENT

We should have fuckin' shotguns.



They CLOSE the trunk.

NOTE: Now is is clear that Vincent and Jules were on their way to a

hired-murder the whole time. Without ever saying it, the Big Mac

conversation showed just how routine it was for them to kill people. Theywere so relaxed that they could get completely grossed out by mayonnaise onFrench fries. That says a lot about the characters.

But it goes much farther than that. In the scene sequence I'm sending with this email, you'll see that they have a complete conversation with the men they're going to kill. About what? Big Macs, mayonnaise, and Bible verses.

HOW'S IT WORK?

In the first scene from NETWORK, the characters are both engaged in what they're obsessed about and they've just MIXED them. It was fresh because no one had ever seen that combination before.

In the second scene from PULP FICTION, the writer simply looked for some interesting trivia that they could engage in to show their state of mind -- on a routine hit.

Both of those are high-quality examples, but the strategy is simple:

A. Put two things together that contrast each other.

B. Simply oppose words and actions in some way.

The show COLOMBO based its main plot device on this -- have the bad guy

help to solve the crime.

I turned to Cheryl and asked her thoughts on this. She said:

"The Mother changes a really stinky diaper while her husband

talks with her about going out for some great tasting barbecue.

Does that sound like Contrasting Dialogue?"

I guess we won't be going out for BBQ tonight. But her example fits quite

ASSIGNMENT

--------------------

Let's put this into action.

1. Write a scene where there is a contrast between the

dialogue and the action/environment in some way.

2. Answer the question "What I learned doing this assignment

is...?"

Deadline: 48 hours



-----------------------------

Usually, the easiest way to do this is to pick an extreme action or extreme environment and then brainstorm dialogue that could be in contrast with that action/environment.

Why extreme? Because that is easier to contrast. Usually, if you can get the action, it is easy to come up with the contrasting

dialogue. Example: What would contrast "changing stinky diaper?"

But you can do anything you'd like as long as there is a clear contrast

between the dialogue and action/environment.

Let your imaginations fly on this one.

Day 5: Dialogue Structures


Today, we'll work with three structures for dialogue that will give your scenes more realism. These structures you'll see every day if you listen closely to people's dialogue. And they are easy ways to improve the feel of your dialogue without having to change it much. They are:

1. Circular dialogue.

2. Metaphoric dialogue.

3. Two different conversations at the same time.

At first look, these seem superficial, but they can make profound changes to the experience of the reader/audience. So look closely.

1. CIRCULAR DIALOGUE

This is one of the easiest of all dialogue techniques. Essentially, one or more characters begin a subject, are interrupted, and circles back to their original subject. This simple scene shows the structure:

INT. KITCHEN -- DAY

Mike tries to sneak past the breakfast table and out the

door. Sarah walks in just in time.

Oh, good, you're still here.

Yeah, just leaving.

If you don't have any emergencies,

can you help me clean up a bit?

Hey, I was going to ask you, what do

you think about the extra charge

that the Homeowner's association has

applied to our payments?

Sarah starts running the water on the dishes.

I don't like it one bit.

Thirty-three percent increase over

the last year.

Where's all that money going?

New administrator, I think.

Well I, for one, am going to speak

up at the next meeting.

Sarah hands him a dishtowel.

If you'll dry, I'll wash.

(looks toward the

Alright.


Sarah started by making a request of Mike. Mike distracted, then Sarah

returned to her original request. Ever had that happen to you? When two

people have different things that are important to them, their

conversations will often include circular dialogue.

2. METAPHORIC DIALOGUE

There are two varieties of metaphoric dialogue:

A. When someone speaks through metaphors. Like a business person who

consistently talks through sports metaphors. "The client was walking us

out. It was the ninth inning and just before we left, Jack hit a home run."

Other metaphors: Nature, war, business, religion, movies, etc.

This, again, is an expression of "Life Metaphors" and I include it to emphasize that a Life Metaphor needs to be a metaphor, not just a saying or belief.

B. When two characters are doing and talking about something that actually represents something more important to them.

This happens in a lot of love scenes where the stroking of a horse or the tending of flowers is played out as foreplay to making love.

In the scene below (from the book "Writing Dialogue for Scripts" by Rib

Davis), you'll see two characters talking. Alice gives an opinion and

instead of attacking Alice's POV, Cath attacks Alice's breadmaking.

INT. ALICE'S KITCHEN -- DAY

Alice is kneading the dough to make bread. Cath watches.

I'm just going to have to leave.

Find another job.

Well he's mad--

Pass the flour, could you?

She does as she talks.

--completely obsessed with

punctuality. It's driving me round

the bend.

Have you told him?

I mean, if I'm just a minute late--

(overlapping)

But have you told him that he's being--

(overlapping)

I think he's trying to establish his

authority or something. No, of course

I haven't told him -- He's my boss.

I'd tell Barbara.

Yeah, well he's not Barbara, is he?

Why do you bother to make bread,

Alice? It's just as good from the

supermarket.

Thanks very much.

And it's probably cheaper. It's

certainly less messy.

Alice kneads the bread in silence. After a moment--

I mean Brian was always so kind -

flowers and whatever.

Maybe this new fella'll calm down.

Or maybe he won't. Even time off in

lieu - he makes me fell as if I'm

not really entitled to it.

Alice stops kneading for a moment.

Well you do...

A look from Cath, but Alice carries on speaking and resumes

kneading.

You did use to take quite a lot of

time--

No more than I was entitled to!



You're meant to be able to take time

off - it's in lieu - you know?

Yeah, yeah.

Lengthy pause.

So...will that really rise?

Should do, yeah.

3. TWO DIFFERENT CONVERSATIONS AT THE SAME TIME

Person A talks about one thing. Person B talks about another. You'd think they're in two different rooms. They're not communicating, that's for sure. But somehow, it comes around in a way that reveals character and makes sense to the audience.

You can see this in the brilliant scene from THE AMERICAN PRESIDENT.

President Shepard returns to the White House after going back on a deal he made with Sydney, who is his girlfriend and who also works for an

environmental lobby firm.

Here, she's talking about a sweater that she borrowed from her sister.

He's trying to figure out why she's leaving. Two different

conversations...until they explode into the real problem. You'll also note that the writer uses a metaphor (the sweater) and circular dialogue.

INT. SHEPHERD'S BEDROOM - LATE AFTERNOON

SYDNEY is going through the closet in search of something.

The door opens, and SHEPHERD steps in, perhaps a little

tentatively. He doesn't see SYDNEY at first.

SHEPHERD

(calling out)

SYDNEY comes out.

SYDNEY


Have you seen a gray cableknit

sweater?


SHEPHERD

A grey...sweater? No. I called you

at the office, but...

SYDNEY


It's Beth's. I wore it here one time,

and I didn't want to leave it.

SHEPHERD

Where were you going?

SYDNEY continues her search.

SYDNEY


I'm going home, and then I'm going

to Hartford.

SHEPHERD

Connecticut?

SYDNEY

Yes. Do you know if it was sent with



your dry cleaning by any--

SHEPHERD


What's in Connecticut?

SYDNEY


Richard Reynolds' campaign. He may

be able to get me a job.

SHEPHERD

When did you decide to get a new

SYDNEY

Not long after Leo Solomon fired me



from my old one. Beth's gonna kill

me. She loves that--

SHEPHERD

Why did he fire you?

SYDNEY

Total failure to achieve any of the



objectives for which I was hired. I

told him he was being unreasonable.

After all, I did get to dance with

the President and ride in Air Force

One a couple of times. But you know

those prickly environmentalists.

It's always gonna be something with

them. If it's not clean air, then

it's clean water. Like it isn't good

enough that I'm on the cover of People

Magazine.

SHEPHERD


I'll call him.

SYDNEY


You'll call him? You mean you'll

call him yourself? Personally?

It'll come from the President?

That's a great idea. I think you

should call Leo and make a deal. He

hires me back for, say, 72 days. I

go around scaring the hell out of

Congress, making them think that the

President's about to drive through a

very damaging and costly bill.

They'll believe me, right, 'cause

I'm the President's Friday Night

Girl. Now I don't know if you can

dip into this well twice, especially

since I've lost all credibility in

politics, but you never know, I might

just be able to pull it off again. I

might be able to give you just the

leverage you need to pass some ground-

breaking piece of crime legislation --

like a mandatory three-day waiting

period before a five-year-old can

buy an Uzi.

She slams the drawer.

SYDNEY

Fuck the sweater -- she'll have to



learn to live with disappointment.

She starts to exit.

SHEPHERD

What do you think went on here today?

She stops.

SYDNEY


I know exactly what went on here

today. I got screwed. You saw the

poll, you needed the crime bill, you

couldn't get it on your own, so I

got screwed.

SHEPHERD


The environment got screwed. Nothing

happened to you today, Sydney.

Governing is choosing. Governing is

prioritizing. I've made no secret of

the fact that the crime bill was my

top priority.

SYDNEY

Well then, congratulations. It's



only taken you three years to put

together crime prevention legislation

that has no hope of preventing crime.

SYDNEY heads out the door--

SHEPHERD

(stopping)

Sydney. Please. I don't want to lose

you over this.

SYDNEY

Mr. President, you got bigger problems



than losing me. You just lost my

And SYDNEY is out the door...

...we HOLD on SHEPHERD, looking like a man who's taken a lot

of punches to the head...

Did you see all three? The sweater is a metaphor for Sydney's anger and

disappointment. Shepherd and Sydney are having two different conversations. And Sydney begins with the "sweater" and then circles back to it.

All simple structures that can dramatically raise the entertainment value of a scene.

BTW, I'm including an article I wrote showing some of the other techniques that are used in this same scene. It is worth a second read if you saw it in the newsletter.

So now you have three different dialogue structures and if there's any

1   2   3   4   5   6   7   8   9   ...   13


Verilənlər bazası müəlliflik hüququ ilə müdafiə olunur ©atelim.com 2016
rəhbərliyinə müraciət