March, on International Women’s Day, 75 young women from across Sunderland attended a performance of Open Clasp’s
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O n the 8th March, on International Women’s Day, 75 young women from across Sunderland attended a performance of Open Clasp’s BlueGiro at Ayton Youth Centre organised by The Box Youth Project. During the post show workshop, which looked at risk and responsibility, it was acknowledged that we women and young women are constantly told to how to behave in order to keep ourselves safe from sexual violence and rape. That, in line with current research by Opinion Matters, it is often believed that in some circumstances women and young women should accept responsibility. For example if they accept a drink from a lad, are alone with a lad, kiss a lad, dance in a sexy manner with a man/lad, dress provocatively, walk home alone or if a young woman is drunk and passes out, then it's her responsibility if she is raped.
The young women were asked what messages should be given to men and young men in order to keep women and young women safe. The following is the outcome. Men should remember: Get a YES before you UNDRESS! Always make sure the girl says yes Yes means yes and no means no, there is no grey area If she’s drunk she’s not consenting - If a girl is legless don’t take the risk Silence doesn’t mean consent If you threaten a woman it’s not consent Sex without consent is rape If in doubt keep it in your trousers Respect women Don’t take advantage of women Make sure the girl is not underage Know that age difference matters - if you are over 16 it’s illegal for you to have sex with someone under 16 Women should be able to wear what they want The way women dress/dance/act doesn’t mean you can take advantage You have no right to take what you want Women have the right to change their minds If a girl is by herself it doesn’t mean she’s looking for a man or sex Girls aren’t just there for sex Have respect within marriage, women and girls aren’t your property If a girl or woman is sexually active it doesn’t mean that she’s easy. Use protection, but remember just cos a girl’s carrying condom’s doesn’t mean she’s up for it. Don’t take girls home that you don’t know Be cautious Don’t be led astray Don’t force anyone to do anything Have zero tolerance of violence against women Never meet a girl online Don’t send pictures of women to others or share on the internet Respect girls privacy Get to know somebody Trust her Your body is your temple Ask yourself how would you feel if it happened to someone you know e.g. family member? If a girl is flirting with you and dressed sexily it doesn’t mean you can have sex with her. Make sure you’re on the same wavelength. Never think women are there for the taking. Control yourself Don’t pressurise girls or supply them with too much alcohol and don’t spike drinks Don’t touch inappropriately Don’t use rude comments Don’t assume Don’t mislead Don’t put women under pressure Don’t force You have a choice |