| Self-made man: A horrible example of unskilled labor. COFFEE.COM not found: A)dd more, R)eheat F)reak out. The more known about people, the more to admire in dogs. The worst thing about censorship is . I never rise above the noise and confusion... Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them. The best defense against logic is stupidity. The arrogance of age must submit to be taught by youth. Time goes? No. Alas time stays, we go. When everyone thinks alike, then everyone is stupid. When all think alike, then no one is thinking. As for me, all I know is that I know nothing. Manuals out, after all possible keystrokes have failed. "May you live all the days of your life." Swift Waiting to overcome all objections, results in nothing. Overestimation: Thinking that all your geese are swans. Be suspicious of all native-born Esperanto speakers. No answer is also an answer. Round numbers are always false. Friendships are not always preserved in alcohol. Our future is always uncertain our end is always too near A farmer is always going to be rich next year. God heals, but always someone else wants a fee. One who is always in a stew generally goes to pot. The wrong way always seems the more reasonable. Bureaucracy: That place always in need of a laxative. Sysoping, not just an adventure, sometimes it's emesis. A hen is an egg's way of making another egg. I am not an animal! I am ... well, not an animal. If this were an actual tagline, it might be funny. If this were an actual tagline, it _might_ be funny. O Oysters come and walk with us, the Walrus did beseech. Surly to bed, and surly to rise. Take two crows and caw me in the morning "Help! I've fallen and can't get up." A. Tree Beware! I'm armed and have suffered from PMS all my life. Wisdom of many and the wit of a half. Man loves little and often, woman much and rarely. Some nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men Take egotism out, and you castrate the benefactors. Words, words, words. And no place to put them all! There are no answers at best a few possibly good guesses. When you find anything that works, it usually fails. Adam ate the apple, and our teeth still ache. Pedestrian: The most approachable chap in the world. Shhhhhh.....the topic cops are coming Words and ideas are what change our world. Actions from sanity are not necessarily from feeling. Silly rabbit, tricks are for hookers! "All humans things are subject to decay." The only realities are the atoms and empty space. Silly Wabbit, QWKs are for kids. "But once you are real, you can't become unreal again." "Men, in general, are but great great children" Napoleon Noble deeds that are concealed are most esteemed. I am not arguing with you, I'm telling you. Window-screen: An arrangement for keeping flies in. *FLASH* Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. Architecture is the art of how to waste space. A nose in artificial manure is not studying nature. Actions are neither as good nor as evil as impulses. "With our judgements as our watches, none go just alike." No one does as much harm as one going about doing good. I'm as innocent as a new-laid egg. Sharper than an asp's tooth to have a thankless child. All reality is aspect dependent. Today, take an astronaut to launch. The best blood at times gets into fools and mosquitoes. Hasten to laugh at everything lest you be obliged to weep Childish Game: One at which your spouse beats you. Please don't yell at me. I'm new at this. "We must laugh at man, to avoid crying for him" Napoleon Sandwich: An faulty attempt to make both ends meat. That's a smug aura of respectability you see in a mirror? Genealogy: tracing us back to the same brother and sister Memoirs are the backstairs of history. Since GOD spelled backwards is DOG, is my poodle Satan? Modesty is good bait when fishing for praise. You tell 'em, Bald Head, You're smooth. You tell 'em Banana, You've been skinned. You tell 'em Bank, You're safe. Look out for barking dogs that bite. A good dog barks when told. This door is baroque; please call Bach later. I may not be perfect, but I am all I got! Most allies must be watched just like the enemy. Caution: Breathing may be hazardous to your health. Things could only be worse in Cleveland. Every child should be given the desire to learn. You tell 'em Bean, He's stringing you. A thing of beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Save trees, eat beavers. No person ever became wicked all at once. History repeats itself because nobody listens Envy is thin because it bites but never eats. Misery brings strange bedfellows. They who drink beer will think beer. Where do honey bees go potty? At a BP station naturally. The woman cries before the wedding; the man afterward. Honesty: Fear of being caught. It's hard to believe it, but some teens are humans. A liar isn't believed even when he speaks the truth. Beware of true believers you may be duped by a false god. Some thoughts are best guillotined before actions result. Sex isn't the best nor the worst thing in the world. We're off doing beta, the wonderful beta of oooz Old age is better than the alternative. Is wetter REALLY better? Monologue: A conversation between realtor and prospect. Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice. If you can't bite, don't show your teeth. ZMODEM has bigger bits, softer blocks, and tighter ASCII. When no wind blows, even the weather vane has character. We are in bondage to the law so that we may be free. If it ain't borken, don't fix it. Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. Fat heads, lean brains. You tell 'em Brake, You've got the drag. Please! Do not break character! The only heavy breathing I ever hear is after aerobics. Engraving is, in brief terms, the art of scratch. Politics: Passing the buck or passing the doe. An actor without buck teeth can play the Easter Bunny. That's not a bug, that's a feature. We ask advice but we mean approbation. Love thy neighbor, but keep the hedge in tact. I'm incredibly jealous, but still glad for you. I'm terribly sorry, but I'm afraid you're just a mirage. Time is precious, but truth is more so. Marriage, a romance but the hero dies in the 1st chapter. OK, I'm weird! But I'm saving up to become eccentric. You tell 'em Butcher, You've got a lot of tongue. Hm..what's this red button fo������NO CARRIER Bad officials: elected by good citizens who fail to vote. <<< Tagline deleted by Natl Endowment for the Arts >>> The mind grows by what it feeds upon. Birds are trapped by their feet, people by their tongues. This tagline stolen by Silly Little Mail Reader! You tell 'em cabbage, You've got the head. You tell 'em calendar, You've got lots of dates. It's okay to call someone stupid; just don't prove it. Only the stupidest calves chose their own butcher. Even the blind can see money. Of course I can cook, but I never do it on the first date A thick head can do as much damage as a hard heart. A red nose can be the result of sunshine or moonshine. Few of us can stand prosperity -- someone else's. Genius: One who can do anything except earn a living. By trying we can learn to endure another's adversity. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit. Without fingers you cannot even thumb your nose. "Oh captain! my captain! our fearful trip is done." WW Collector: Person few care to see but ask to call again. If you don't care where you are, then you can't get lost. Judge not a carpenter on how fast chips fly. A jug is carried under your coat for a dishonest reason. You tell 'em Cashier, I'm a poor teller. To the old cat, the tender mouse. You tell 'em Cat, That's what you're fur. Gotta run, the cat's caught in the printer. If one cannot catch a bird of paradise, grab a wet hen. The highest bidder catches the most politicians. You tell 'em Cemetery, You are so grave. Adventure is the champagne of life. Getting a second chance is never a certainty. Everything changes except change itself. When in doubt; Cheat ! "Man's the bad child of the universe." Oppenheim HELP! Protect America's children, soil, and water today. You tell 'em Chloroform, You can put them to sleep. Jury: A group chosen to decide who has the best lawyer. You tell 'em Church Bell, I told you. You tell 'em Cigarette, You're lit up. The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. To be too clever is to be stupid. Choose heaven for climate, hell for society. You tell 'em Clock, You've got the time. Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted! It was so cold, I almost got married. Save the whales. Collect the whole set. When the bad combine, the good must associate. The World: A comedy for thinkers; a tragedy for feelers. The world is coming to an end! Don't steal.....Politicians hate competition. Born crying, live complaining, die disappointed. Whatever is well conceived can be well expressed. Reality: Only a concept and the home of the brave. Only hey can conquer who believe they can. Nothing is ever constant, unless it is dead. We have resumed control...we have resumed control... It's a poor cook who cannot lick his own fingers. A sleeping fox counts hens in his dreams. Pants: Trousers' country cousins. Many would be cowards if they had courage enough. Society prepares the crime; the criminal commits it. Straight trees have crooked roots. A good rooster crows in any hen house. What youth deemed crystal, age finds was dew. You tell 'em Cucumber, I've been pickled. No medicine can cure a vulgar person. It's easier to curse the candle than light the darkness. You tell 'em Custard Pie, You've got the crust. Other times, other customs. Cynicism is intellectual dandyism. Clever father, clever daughter; clever mother, clever son Today is a day for making firm decisions!!!!! Or is it? Each day a day goes by. I've had BETA days ... and nights!!! Happy couple: A deaf husband and a blind wife. Skeptics are seldom deceived. Let no good deed go unpunished. There is no defense except stupidity against a new idea. Fishing is a delusion surrounded by liars in old clothes. Living: The best demonstration of victory over mortality. You tell 'em Dentist, You've got the pull. You tell 'em Dictionary, You're full of information. "Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.." Old musicians never die, they just decompose. Not everything more difficult is more meritorious. A gentleman can disagree without being disagreeable. America was not discovered by Americans, shame on them. Talking is another disease of age. On a clear disk you can seek forever. I had a dislocated funny bone, but it's better now Detour: The roughest distance between two points. Those without heads do not need hats. How many times do you need to be tolled anyway? It's 11:56 pm. Do you know where your modem is? Those who can, Do. Those who can't, Criticize. You tell 'em Doctor, You've got the patience. Raising your voice does not reinforce your argument. Dachshund: Half a dog high by a dog and a half long. Even a noseless dog can stink. An inch of dog is better than a mile of pedigree. You tell 'em Dough, You're well bred. When we can't dream the time for death has arrived. America is a dream to most of the world. Camels have wet dreams too. Only in your dreams are you really free. Time is the dressmaker specializing in alterations. What soberness conceals, drunkenness reveals. Users: Keep them dry and don't feed them after midnight. And God said: E = �mv� - Ze�/r ...and there *WAS* light! "Earth was not earth before her sons appeared." Character is much easier kept than recovered. If you don't eat garlic, they'll never smell it on you. Cats, proof that eating and sleeping isn't all bad. Dan Quayle: the EDLIN of Vice-Presidents. Scrute the inscrutable; eff the ineffable. Every hard-boiled egg is yellow inside. Apology is only egotism wrong side out. You tell 'em Electricity, You can shock 'em. Silence is more eloquent at times than words. Outside noisy, inside empty. Madre que consiente engorda una serpiente. This fellow's wise enough to play the fool. Adult: One old enough to know better. Excess is never enough. You tell 'em Envelope, You're well posted. The cautious seldom err. The child had every toy his father wanted. Communication.. without it, everyone's a mushroom. I can resist everything except temptation. I can resist everything/anything except temptation. PCs are OK except when you use them as bowling balls. Stupidity is no excuse for not thinking. Assassination is the extreme form of censorship. Poker Face: The face that launched a thousand chips. If you don't fall down, you're not trying! The ripest fruit falls first.. "Modesty died when false modesty was born." Mark Twain A great many family trees were started by grafting. The greatest of faults is to be conscious of none. Both of his feet are firmly planted in the air. Bachelor: Plays the field until the field comes in. His face was filled with broken commandments. Don't knock President Fillmore; he kept us out of VietNam Notice: All incoming fire has the right of way. To live now, first come to terms with your past. God made the first garden, Cain the first city. Ivo Andric - Yugoslavia's First Nobel Laureate. Learning makes people fit company for themselves. Where are those flashbacks they promised me? "Don't worry, I'm fluent in weirdo" "Oh could I fly, I'd fly with thee ..." Seek not to follow footsteps but what they sought. Words are not food, though sometimes we must eat them. Meetings are indispensable for not doing anything. SHIN - A device for finding furniture in the dark. Nickel: Once good for getting the wrong number with. Solution Series: Works for Windows, Publisher and Money A fool searches for a greater fool to find admiration. Are you waiting for your prey? What are friends for? - R.M. Nixon Wait! That's the FORBIDDEN dance! You aren't here forever, Enjoy each day as a miracle. Life is lived forwards, but understood backwards. Swell-head: Nature's frantic effort to fill a vacuum. "A book, a friend, a song, a glass, a chaste loving lass" A pest: A friend in need. Young gorillas are friendly, but they soon learn. Mischief all comes from too much opening of the mouth. Genealogy. Tracing descent from someone who didn't. Cats are like furry dilettanti, or the reverse? You tell 'em Gambler, You've got winning ways. Security is a game but the final goal is never reached. The thing most generally raised on land is taxes. Everyone is a genius at least once a year. Criminal: One who gets caught. Even a philosopher gets upset with a toothache. Monotheism is a gift from the gods! Angling: The name given to fishing by non-fishermen. Remember................. Wherever you go, there you are. Mosquito: Designed by God to make flies seem better. Those whom the gods love grow young. "I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul." Against stupidity, the Gods themselves, contend in vain ! A pitcher that goes to a well too often is broken first. As I was going up the stair, I met a man who wasn't there You tell 'em Goldfish, You've been around the globe. Obesity: A surplus gone to waist. This is a good day to let down old friends who need help. Women take to good hearted men. Also from. Hero-worship: Idol gossip. No person should govern another without their permission. Misteaching: Telling one's grandmother how to suck eggs. Dancing with a grass widow brings on hay fever. Always do right: Gratify some and astonish the rest. Epitaph on a gravestone: Cheerio, see you soon. Many foxes grow gray, but few grow good. "Life has a great deal up its sleeve." Greed is good, greed works. Make two grins grow where there was only a grouch before. Today I have grown taller from walking with the trees. I wish Adam had died with all his ribs in his body. If youth only had a chance or old age any brains. Well begun is half done. A big enough hammer fixes anything Use your enemy's hand to catch a snake. Politics: The glad hand and the marble heart. Many kiss the hand that they wish cut off. Money can't buy happiness, but allows a choice of misery. Freedom is a hard-bought thing - A gift no man can give. A miser is hard to live with, but makes a fine ancestor. A miser is hard to live with, but makes a fine ancestor. Old birds are hard to pluck. That's right, try hard to be good at the game of life. You tell 'em Hard-Boiled Egg, You're hard to beat. Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch! Carelessness does more harm than a want of knowledge. A KGB keyboard has no key! Even the lion has to protect himself against flies. The Caldecott Tunnel has less traffic than that vagina. Friend: Anyone who has the same enemies you have. How much memory have you got? One brain, one memory. Some settling may have occurred in shipping. Thousands of journeys have a start but no end. Drop your carrier...We have you surrounded! Sir Lancelot, you have chain mail in Knight's Conf Only the rich have distant relatives. Teaching: Appearing to have known your subject forever. Do well, you hear it never. Do ill, hear it forever. "Shake off your heavy trance! And leap into a dance." A little truth helps the lie go down. What we have here is a failure to communicate. So crowded in here, I must go outside to change my mind! If I were here more often, I wouldn't be gone so much. Evil is a hill. We stand on ours, speak about others. To a dog his owner is Napoleon; hence their popularity. It's only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only a. Fiction: It can't hold a scandal to biography. Charity begins at home, and mostly ends where it begins. Fishing rod: a hook at one end, a fool at the other. You tell 'em Horse, You carry a tale. If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. Tact is knowing how far to go in going too far. To be a human without passion is to be dead. You tell 'em Hunter, I'm game. The truth doesn't hurt unless it ought to. Fear not, for I have given you authority To the Caliph I am dirt, but to dirt, I am Caliph. "Frankly my dear, I don't give a download!" -Rhett Sysop If I die, I forgive you, if I recover, we shall see. Not now ... I have to go mow the laundry. As long as I live, I shall be, myself, no other, just me. Trust me, would I lie to you..... TWICE? To whom should I go to for some self-help? Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor. "I'm so bored, I'm starting to miss my husband." I think that I'm the friendliest guy in my zipcode. --T-A+G-L-I+N-E--+M-E-A+S-U-R+I-N-G+--G-A+U-G-E--. It works better if you plug it in *AND THEN* turn it on. Youngsters remember anything if it happened or not. It works better if you plug it in where it should be. Is it progress if a cannibal uses a knife and fork? The greater the ignorance the greater the dogmatism. Power is an illusion; only stupidity is real. Planned parenthood --- the impossible dream. We all live in a yellow subroutine. One who is in peril thinks with their legs. Blessings never come in pairs; misfortunes never alone. It is hereditary in my family to have no children. What is learned in youth is understood in age. ROM wasn't built in a day. He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals. Don't hate yourself in the morning - sleep till noon. Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight. There's no skeletons in my closet! A jerk present in a group indicates a jerk in charge. When uncertain, or in doubt, run in circles and scream. "A Robin redbreast in a cage puts all heaven in a rage." Instinct is intelligence incapable of self-consciousness. Corruption. The most infallible symptom of liberty. Human Being: An ingenious assembly of portable plumbing. Tact is the intelligence of the heart. Worry is the interest paid on trouble in advance. All rivers run into the sea, yet the sea is not full. Travel important today; IRS men arrive tomorrow. A learned fool is more foolish than an ignorant fool. At 19, everything is possible; tomorrow looks friendly. The greatest fault is to be conscious of none. When all else is lost, the future still remains. Living on earth is better than loafing around Hades. The worst hatred is that of relatives. One person's is another's . To tolerate everything is to teach nothing. The greatest cunning is to have none at all. Talking of bulls is not like being in the bull ring. The shortest answer is doing. A good memory is one trained to forget the trivial. The only certainty is that nothing is certain. Hi. My name is Rover, I'll paint your car yellow free. A belly button is for salt when you eat celery in bed. Society like air, is necessary but not complete for life. The best armor is to keep out of range. Too often justice is incidental to law and order. Not to know is bad, but not to wish to know is worse. The best doctor is the one you run for and can't find. Non-fiction often is more unrealistic than fiction. The trodden path is the safest. Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to God. An accommodating vice is better than an obstinate virtue. Firmness in politics is called obstinacy in a donkey. Learning without thought is labor lost. A good scare is better than good advice. A leap year is never a good sheep year. A lawyer's opinion is worth nothing unless paid for. A hen tomorrow is more valuable than an egg today. A leap year is never a good sheep year. To do nothing is in every person's power. Unless to thought is added will, Apollo is an imbecile. Acting without thinking is like shooting without aiming. The living world is a continuum in each and every aspect. A verbal contract isn't worth the paper its written on If you find it, it is always in the last place you look. Love your enemies -- it makes them so damned mad. What good does it do an ass to be called a lion? I finally got it all together, but forgot where I put it Good printers do it without wrinkling the sheets. Money is round, it rolls away. Your sin, was it of omission, commission, or emission? I don't want it now, I want it RIGHT now! "To live long, it is necessary to live slowly." Cicero Difficult? I wish it had been impossible! Yield to temptation; It may not pass your way again. Spaghetti code = job security. There is no joy in Mudville, mighty Casey has struck out. The Day of Judgement is approaching, or it is not. You tell 'em June, And don't July. My reality check just bounced. What the heck just happened here? Poker: It's darkest just before you've drawn. Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses. Nobody can be just like me. Even I have trouble. Retreat hell! We're just fighting in another direction. Humpty Dumpty DOS - Just a shell of himself. Little boats should keep near the shore. DANGER! Human at keyboard! Drink! for you know not whence you came, nor why... To live well, know the difference between good and evil. Psychic Con: You know where and when Drink! for you know not why you go, nor where... A child prodigy knows not to bother with it. To climb a ladder, you begin with the first rung. Tact: Recalling a lady's birthday but forgetting her age. No wonder can last more than three days. Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative. "Our first and last love is -- self-love." Bovee Happiness is no laughing matter. Custom is the law of fools. He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides. A hen who lays an egg cackles as if it was an asteroid. Philosophy: A route leading from nowhere to nothing. One lie always leads to another. I'd give my left arm to be ambidextrous ATTENTION ..............Elvis has left the echo. "And God said, Let there be light: and there was light." Beware when God lets loose a thinker on this planet. The tree of liberty is watered with the blood of tyrants. A beard signifies lice, not brains. Art is a lie that makes us realize the truth. "What is a lie but the truth in masquerade." Byron All your future lies beneath your hat. A well-written life is as rare as a well-spent one. That concept looks like a chicken in a windstorm. Nobody can be like me. Even I have trouble doing so. Network management is like trying to herd cats... Things are more like they used to be than they are now. The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only heavier The world is like a cactus except the pricks are inside. Stupidity has no limits, genius does. Let's have a little fun, let's do a pun. Better to understand little than misunderstand a lot. Think much, speak little, and write less. I'd like to live like a poor person with lots of money. I want to live with a synonym girl... God dislikes money -- look who he gives it to. Civilized people need love for full sexual satisfaction. It's love, it's love that makes the world go round. Everyone as they loveth, some people kiss cows. Usually insane; in lucid moments merely stupid. It is bad luck to be superstitious. Diplomacy: The patriotic lying for one's country. We are as made by God us, and often a great deal worse. If you can't make it work, make a statistic of it. When you can't make it GOOD, make it BIG! Two writes don't make a novel! Silver and gold make even pigs seem clean. The wildest colts make the best steeds. Too many pages make a tome. Money: A mint makes it first and we try to make it last. Bigamist: One who makes the same mistake twice. Behind every successful man stands a surprised MIL. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a moose. "A man's a man for a' that!" Burns A worthless wise man always charms the rabble. Man's inhumanity to man makes countless thousands mourn. You tell 'em Manicurist, I've been trimmed. He has too many lice to feel an itch. "Every woman should marry -- and no man." Disraeli "All clowns are masked, all personae flow from choices" Fame: Chiefly a matter of dying at the right moment. Does it really matter which cola I drink? What a day may bring, a day may take away. Scotty! Hurry! Beam me uragg^*�� NO CARRIER Do you like me for my brain, or my BAUD? Never agree with me, it shakes my self confidence. Where you've been means much less than where you're going Blessed are the meek, for they make great scapegoats. "Love -- a grave mental disease." Plato "Maytag" is my middle name; I'm an agitator. To keep your milk sweet, leave it in the cow. Theater: Holding a mirror up to a keyhole. To understand other's miseries, look at their pleasures. Man is the missing link between apes and human beings. Computers don't make mistakes, but foolish people do. Flattery is counterfeit money, circulated by vanity. You tell 'em Moon, You're out all night. "Everything's got a moral if only you can find it." What fools these morals be! There's always 1 more SOB than you counted on The wise learn more from fools than fools from the wise. Cow's breath attracts mosquitoes and tsetse flies! He is the most sensible looking man talking nonsense. Leisure is the mother of philosophy. Russian Express Card motto: Don't leave home! You tell 'em Mountain, I'm only a bluff. An elephant: A mouse built to government specifications. Honey in the mouth and knives in the heart. Civilization is a movement, it is a voyage not a harbor. You must know much before you know how little you know. You learn as much by writing as you do by reading. If you throw mud, you will have dirty hands. None but a mule denies his family. Mister! Here's your mule! Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art. With foxes we must play the fox. Philosophic enjoyment = mutual misunderstanding. I may have my faults, but being wrong ain't one of them. I haven't lost my mind..It must be backed-up somewhere. I use windows...on my car, on my house, but not on my... If you want my advice, pay me! hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY? Ethics is not necessarily the handmaiden of theology. Children have more need of models than of critics. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel. Remember, the end never justifies the meanness. The sun is never the worse for shining on a dunghill. Women and elephants never forget real or supposed injury. "Women and elephants never forget." Parker Just got a new car for my wife... Great trade... "God said, "Let Newton be!" and all was light." Pope Homo sum; humani nihil a me alienum puto. An atheist has no invisible means of support. Beauty faded has no second spring. Judicial reform is no sport for the short-winded. Where there is no shame, there is no honor. En boca cerrada no entran moscas. Easy as pie, no fuss, no muss, no crust.... Dios tarda pero no olvida. When we are not sure, we are alive. The past is not what it will be. The cinema is not a slice of life but a piece of cake. Closed eyes are not always sleeping. The future is not what it used to be. The consumer is not a moron, it is your spouse. Incorrigible punster -- do not incorrige! "The law hath not been dead, though it hath slept." Shake The city is not a concrete jungle. It is a human zoo. 5�" floppy is not better than 3�" hard. Education which is not modern, faces the organic fate. A crappie is not a sunfish found in a toilet. Honesty pays, but not enough for some. It's nobody's business, not even mine. A mother is not a dust rag. A bigot will not reason, a fool cannot, a slave dare not. Art is vision not expression. One crow will not peck out another crow's eyes. All things change, nothing is extinguished. A hole is nothing, but you can break your neck in it. Man: There is nothing more miserable and more arrogant. God gives the nuts, but He does not crack them. Penguin: The headwaiter of the Antarctic. This open hand of desire wants everything. Vulgarity: The conduct of others. Oh well, half of one, six dozen of the other. In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. A living example of Artificial Intelligence. Graveyards are full of the indispensable. Shake, a man of note, wrote so many things to quote. .... a deluge of words and drop of sense. The only winner of the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky. A male rite of passage: Writing your name in the snow. Often the test of courage is not to die but to live. The eventual supremacy of reason should be accepted. Admiration: Polite recognition of self-reflection. Psychoceramics: The study of crackpots. Solve the problems of the world: Vote anarchist. Rainforest: a scarcity of animals a plethora of tourists. Endocannibalism: The result of a really hungry cannibal. "The first sigh of love is the last of wisdom." Bret Every valuable idea offends someone. Lean books are often larded with the fat of others' works Blond Mating Call: Oh, I'm so drunk [giggle]!! If you're too old to learn, you were born so. Marriages are based on believing you won the arguments. Since life goes on - you might as well get on with it. The Devil falls on account of his gravity. If God lived on earth, people would break his windows. Knowledge rests not on truth alone, but upon error also. The truth is one thing that nobody will believe. All for one; one for all; ME above all! An ass thinks one thing, his rider another. "Let's win this one and go home." - George A. Custer An agreeable person: One who agrees with you. Life is an onion and one peels it crying. Don't shoot! I'm only the Casio player! Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. This tagline is only for the living. He is not only dull within, but causes dullness without. Many receive advice, only the wise profit by it. People are the only creatures with the power of laughter. America is the only country founded on a good idea. Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly. You tell 'em Operator, You've got their number. Drama in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater. Radical: Anyone whose opinion differs from ours. Beware of the opinion of someone without any facts. Ever wonder why Oprah spelled backwards is Harpo? Lunatic asylum: where optimism most flourishes. Either he's dead or my watch has stopped. Adam's Rib: The original bone of contention. Shame is an ornament to the young, a disgrace to the old. The best way out of a difficulty is through it. When puns are outlawed only outlaws will have puns "The only victory over love is flight." Napoleon I can't be overdrawn, I still have checks! You tell 'em Owl, You're wise. We make our own fortunes and call them our fate. Quien da el pan impone la ley. Love truth but pardon error. Chance makes our parents, but choice makes our friends. Hello, I am part number �����۳�ݳ�ݳ�. Confirmation of the past is often the greatest surprise. Tips: Wages we pay other people's hired help. Mountains culminate in peaks, and nations in people. All words are pegs on which to hang ideas. All words are pegs on which to hang ideas. Guns don't kill people, off-line readers do. Of all the people I have met, you are certainly one Whenever Possible, Put People On Hold Sinner: A stupid person who gets found out. Strength of mind: Person who can eat one salted peanut. No sense being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway. You tell 'em Piano, You're upright and square. Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. "Man is a piece of the universe made alive." Emerson Whoso diggeth a pit shall fall therein. Restaurant: An eating place that does not sell drugs. Art is either plagiarism or revolution. Originality is undetected plagiarism. You tell 'em playing cards, You know the joker. Reader not found, please notify tagline. It is double pleasure to deceive the deceiver. "A pound of pluck is worth a ton of luck." Garfield *NOW* is a point in time that is already gone. That was a pointing device? My cat thought it was dinner. Bedfellows make strange politicians. The purification of politics is an iridescent dream. Ambition destroys its possessor. Never underestimate the power of human stupidity. Keyboard not connected, press |
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