14. TONIGHT
(To the tune of "Tonight," from West Side Story, By Rabbi Dan Liben Passover, 2000)
Tonight, tonight,
We'll tell a tale tonight,
Of Pharoah, Slaves and God's awesome might;
We'll do it right, with matzah, and maror
and four children: -dull, wicked- and bright!
Tonight, we'll tell our people's story,
The "genut" and then the glory,
And how it came out right..
And when we're through
You'll know you've been freed too
On this Saaay-der night!
Tonight, tonight, we'll drink four cups of wine,
We'll laugh and sing and dine
'till its light;
The tale's not new
And yet it still rings true
It gives meaning -to being -a Jew!
Egyptian masters they did beat us
But Moses he did lead us
From darkness into light;
And soon we'll know
Why God did make it so
On this Saaaay-der night!
15. The Ballad of Mo Amramson
(sung to the tune of "The Ballad of Jed Clampett")
Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Mo,
His people they were slaves to the evil Pharoah,
Until one day he was lookin' at a bush,
And he heard the voice of God, though he wasn't a lush---
The LORD, that is, I AM, The Big G.
Next thing you know, Mo's talkin' to Pharoah,
Mo says, "God said you gotta let my people go!"
But the king says, "No, they always will be slaves to me!"
So God sent down ten big plagues on Pharoah's whole country---
Blood 'n frogs, that is,
Pestilence,
Special effects.
When the first borns died, Pharoah sent the Jews away,
They ran and ate some matzoh on that very happy day,
So now we have our Seder to commemorate that feat---
We drink some wine and talk a lot, we sing and also eat!
Matzoh, that is,
Maror too.
And good food.
Y'all come back now, y'hear!
16. Haggadah Wash that Man Right out of my Hair
Hagadah wash that man right out of my hair
Because he's full of chometz but he doesn't care.
That it's a custom now to be rid of that snare,
I'll send him on his way.
Haggadah drink my wine and feel real free,
Haggadah eat charosez, matzah and tea,
Haggadah keep the seder, with joy and glee.
I really love that day!!
He doesn't like gefilte fish,
eat it up, eat it up.
He doesn't like the matzah dish
Heat it up, heat it up.
can't wait for him to change-
Hey buddy... (repeat 1st verse).
17. Morror
(Sung to the tune of "More..")
Morror is the bitterness the world has known,
But in Canada we need not moan.
Morror were the ghettos of across the sea,
But here we habitate a land that's free.
Morror on the table, we are sure and
we're able to look forward to many
types of joy - oh boy-oi-oi-oi...
Morror is the bitter herb upon our plate,
And if we were sober we would palitate
Morror is the answer for the schnorer, who is rich or poorer-
Why can't we love forever .....Morror!
18. The Eight Nights of Passover
(To the tune of 'The Twelve Days”)
On the first night of Passover my mother served to me
1) a matzo ball in chicken soup
2) two dipped herbs
3) three pieces of matzah
4) four cups of wine
5) five gefilte fish
6) six capons baking
7) seven eggs a boiling
8) eight briskets roasting
19. Moses Island
(Mark Kreditor, sung to the tune of Gilligan's Island)
Just recline right back and you'll hear a tale,
a tale of dreadful trip.
That started with ten awful plagues brought onto Egypt,
brought unto Egypt.
The boss he was a Jewish man raised as a Pharaohos son.
Then G-d he did come calling and soon the fun begun,
soon the fun begun.
More blood, such frogs, and all those bugs,
Pharaoh could just barely see.
The Jews were really scoring points and soon they would be free.
and soon they would be free.
They shlepped and shlepped for forty years across a desert land.
He went up to Mt Sinai and a party soon began, a party soon began.
Moses, the Pharaoh too, Aaron and his wife.
Marianne the skipper too here on the desert island.
20. Don't sit on the Afikomen
(To the tune of Glory, Glory, Hallelu-kah)
My Dad at every Seder breaks a Matza piece in two
And hides the Afikomen half-A game for me and you
Find it, hold it ransom for the Seder isn't through
'till the Afikomen's gone.
Chorus:
Don't sit on the Afikomen.
Don't sit on the Afikomen.
Don't sit on the Afikomen.
Or the Meal will last all night
One year Daddy hid it 'neath a pillow on a chair
But just as I raced over, my Aunt Sophie sat down there
She threw herself upon it-Awful crunching filled the air
And crumbs flew all around
Chorus
There were matza crumbs all over-Oh, it was a messy sight
We swept up all the pieces though it took us half the night
So, if you want your seder ending sooner than dawn's light,
Don't sit on the Afiko-o-men
Chorus
(Mark Kreditor, sung to the tune of The Brady Bunch)
It's a story, about baby Moses, who came floating
down the river called the Nile
Pharoh's Queen was there just to catch him and so he stayed a while.
Its a story about Jewish builders, who were tired
of building Pyramids. All of them were slaves just
like their Mothers and just like their kids.
Until one day big Moses talked to Big G. That's
G-O-D and that spells Moses's God. He said you
just leave and go to Israel I won't make it hard.
So then Moses asked old Pharoh let my people go.
He said "For Real"!, no Moses never no. So the 10
plagues were brought to Pharoh and he said: Moses go .
Your people can go. Now Moses go. That's the
way Pharoh said now Moses go.
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